8 months since I first set eyes on your beautiful little face..... 8 months since we walked into an orphanage/baby house in Latvia and you toddled into our lives - for reals!!
That 8 months has both zoomed by and at times gone so slow. It all depended on where we were in our attachment and bonding journey! Even now, 8 months into our relationship (ha ha ha) some days zoom by and are so amazingly good, and some go by so slow and are painful and difficult.
Adoption is a journey. It's full of beauty and wonder and amazement and love. It is also full of loss and grief and pain and adjustment. I think that often we think that adding a child from a difficult situation/place into a family is easy - that once you give that child who has been deprived of multiple things, proper food, nutrition, shelter, clothing, and love - that they always blossom and that that is enough. Sometimes, that isn't enough. No matter how you do it - taking a child out of an orphanage - whether a good one or a bad one, is always traumatic and an adjustment for the child - and for the parents and family they join. It is hard to find the right balance while your child adjusts to EVERYTHING new in their lives.
There is no way to entirely prepare yourself for the range of emotions and behaviors both your child and YOU will feel. No matter how much you read, no matter how much you research, no matter how much you prepare yourself for every possible scenario - you can never be totally prepared - because you simply don't know your child or exactly what they have been through. Sometimes they will be able to tell you that - and sometimes you will never know - and they won't ever be able to express their loss or grief. But be sure to know - they feel it! It is a huge adjustment to go with people you don't know, to learn a new language, to eat new foods, to experience a wide range of things sooooo outside your comfort zone. It's a big thing for an adult, who can process things on a deeper level - but just imagine what it is like for a two year old - and a two year old with cognitive disabilities. My Pipsqueak - she is one amazing and brave little girl! There is just no other way to explain it! To go through the things she has gone through and work so hard to work through it all and be so brave to give her heart and trust to us. She is amazing :) We love her so much!
Sometimes these 8 months have gone by so fast and it seems like we didn't have a life without our beautiful girl, and sometimes they have gone so slow and it seems like we are stuck and just can't move past one thing or another - but - we always do. And,through it all - the whole journey - the Lord has been teaching me patience. I thought he taught me patience with Littlest Dude, but little did I know, He was just preparing me to learn MORE patience ;) ha ha ha The pre-adoption journey required a lot of patience and the post adoption journey requires equal amounts :) But - parenting in general requires patience on grand levels anyway!!!
But - these 8 months have been full of miracles and magic and wonder and blessings! And they all start with our little Pipsqueak!!! To see her wonder and enjoyment (and occasional terror) as she experiences new things, or things for the first time - is something almost indescribable! To share her first real birthday party, her first Halloween and wonder at trick or treating, her first Christmas - what a blessing! And - I think we enjoy it even more than we did with some of our bio kids (shhhhhhh - don't tell them!) because we know some of what she has gone without for the first almost 3 years of her life! And - it isn't about the gifts - it's about the joy of being with family and the bonds that come with families and traditions and roots! We hope to keep the celebrating of important dates and events from Latvia as part of our new traditions, as well :) Our Pipsqueak has all SORTS of roots :)
The 8 months have been filled with blessings - and joy - and LOVE!!! Just because things are hard sometimes, doesn't mean they aren't good and great and wonderful. If someone asked me about that part of adoption - I would say without a doubt that it is ALL worth it. Pipsqueak knows she is loved - she experiences it daily in word and deed from her family, and SHE has learned to show love too :) She gives unsolicited kisses and hugs to her family - okay - mostly just to her momma and daddy - but she is becoming more comfortable with the others too :) She snuggles into us when we hold her :) She cuddles tightly as we cradle her and rock her to sleep at naps and at bedtime. She is learning compassion - how to show it when someone is hurt or sad - instead turning away and being worried. When she first came home, hearing crying babies etc... was very concerning to her, because I think she thought no one would take care of them. But - she has learned that it does matter if you cry and that someone really will come and meet your needs, pick you up if you are hurt, kiss your owies, give you hugs and hold you when you are sad, help you learn right from wrong in a nurturing way. And - she has blossomed! I look back to pictures of her in Latvia - and I thought she was happy then - but then I look at pictures of her in the last few months - and she is even happier now :) She is confident and there is just a look of something different in her eyes and face now (and a few more lbs ;) haha).
I simply can't imagine our life without her, and my heart swells with love for her. She is for sure one of the most amazing blessings the Lord has bestowed upon us, and we are blessed to have her in our family!!!
Her growth has been amazing - physically she has gained weight and both gross and fine motor skills. She can almost jump with both feet off the ground and she is soooo excited - she has been working so hard :) She can walk up and down the stairs holding on to the railing independently, she can color almost within the lines within 3-4 inch shapes, she is working on lacing beads, making patterns and learning her colors. Her vocabulary has exploded - she easily knows over 100 signs and has word approximations to go with most of them. I hear her calling "MoM' from all over the house - and repeatedly during long car rides :) She can kick and throw a ball. She loves to play with our dog and cats - especially the cats - we think she might be a crazy cat lady when she grows up :) She fits nicely into size 2 clothes now and has grown 2 shoe sizes in the last 8 months! Her hair is getting longer and thicker and overall she is very healthy!!! She loves SigningTime, The Wiggles, Dora and Mickey Mouse Club House :) She has been hiking in two different states, been to Las Vegas, been to soccer games, stayed in hotels, flown on airplanes, attended church, traveled to Canada, met sooo many relatives, jumped in big bouncy houses, gone down huge inflatable slides, gone to swimming pools, slid down water slides, eaten at restaurants, played with friends, danced her heart out playing Just Dance, watched movies on the big screen while enjoying buttered popcorn, bubbly pop and Mom's lap, learned the words to the songs in Frozen and learned what princesses are - and that we think she is one :)
Miracles can happen in 8 months - it took 8 months from the time we found Pipsqueak til we met her for the first time - and now 8 months later - miracles continue to occur - in all our lives!!!!
Soooo - happy 8 months since we gotcha Pipsqueak - here's to a LOT more 8 month increments! We love you!!!!!
